The solar powered garden lamps of the walk way of Napier Museum slowly opened up as the day was bidding goodbye. He was walking slowly with long steps. The doctor had advised him to do so. He was not a regular walker. But the bypass surgery had made him a different person. He had stopped going for evening parties. A lot of restrictions have been imposed in his routine and diet too. His outlook on life has also changed.
An arrogant and able administrator has transformed into a pious man with a lot of compassion for others. His retirement on superannuation has also mollified him quite a bit. He was a man who took his career very seriously. He also made very good progress in his career through sheer determination and hard work. He did have a contented family life too. His wife was quite caring and loving ……yes …..she passed away within a few years of his retirement .The only son had settled in New Zealand for the past decade with his Filipino wife whom he met during his studies in Singapore.
The heart ailment which surfaced within one year after his wife’s untimely death took away a major portion of his enthusiasm in life. It was a Saturday night when he felt uneasy and his neighbor took him to the hospital on time The heart surgery which followed totally changed his lifestyle .The only son came to see him almost one week after he was hospitalized. The medi claim policy and the reverse mortgage loan (2) he had taken after retirement really became handy during the hospitalization. It was not very easy for him and his wife Vimala to decide on a reverse mortgage loan. The house was released from mortgage only a few years ago after paying off the dues in the house building advance. The house was very close to their heart as it was part of their life itself.
After the surgery, he was confined to his own life of simple routine. The electronic gadgets like television, cell phone, laptop etc., were the best companions in life. The only person who could make his life easier was an elderly servant who regularly came to clean the house and cook bland food as advised by doctor. The major physical activity was the walk he used to take in the evenings in the museum garden…
The regular walkers passing by wished him good evening. A few of them shook hands with him. Others just waved hands. A couple of them just smiled and walked away. He continued his lonely walk as the fast walkers went ahead of him. A big group of young joggers ran past him overtaking him from both sides. The sound of the jogger’s steps waned off in a few seconds. By then he had reached the children’s park area. The skyline was almost dark barring a few bright red patches in the western horizon. The garden lights were lit. There were many kids making merry in the park making lot of noise thereby. The birds in the adjacent aviary were adding to the chorus.
He slowed his pace as the pathway was on an upward gradient. “Radha , Radha” came the voice from behind. Suddenly he stopped and turned back as none had called him so for the past forty odd years . He was R K Nair shortened as R K by his colleagues . Only a few of his old time friends called him Radha by choosing the first part of the full name Radha Krishnan Nair. There was a lady in her sixties calling him from behind . He struggled to identify her as the face was not clearly visible because of a big tree blocking the available light . It took a few seconds before he could match the scanned image of her face with the random access memory of his brain . Suddenly the name appeared in the mind’s screen “Mary” ……Mary Jacob.
Mary was his classmate in college days for long five years . A simple , coy and soft spoken girl. Her parents were serving as teachers in Ethiopia and she was staying with her granny during those days . She used to go to Ethiopia during the summer holidays . He was one of the few close friends Mary had . After college days , there was not much of contact between the two. He had once met her sometime in 1979 in a wedding reception of one of their common friends. Then they could spend some time together on their way back from the venue as he had brought his car and Mary accepted his offer for a lift . It was with lot of hesitation that he asked “when are you inviting all for a treat like this ?” for which which Mary just giggled . A two minutes silence which followed could exchange a lot of words through the minds of both Radha and Mary . But ultimately both could not muster courage to talk about anything . But words unsaid could perhaps convey a lot more of inner feelings . The car stopped near her house and she thanked him . Before getting down she did stretch her hand for a confident shake hand which she did not do even on the last day in the college . He could see that Mary’s eyes were gleaming with copious smear of tears while bidding goodbye. Before he could recollect all these happenings of the past , Mary stood in front of him and asked “how are you , Radha? . It is a great meeting you after such a long time . “ Yes it is a real surprise , where were you all these ……” Before he could complete the sentence , rang the bell of his cell phone. It was his son from abroad . As he took the cell and responded , Mary waved her hands as if in a hurry and walked away.
His son talked to him on a very serious matter , the reverse mortgage loan he had taken after his retirement against the bungalow at Golf Links Road , Kowdiar . His son was very skeptical about it He even told him “ Dad , I could have sent enough money if asked for “ That was the last thing R K wanted to do.
By the time the call ended there was no trace of Mary anywhere nearby. He was upset about the call and the timing of it too. He felt he could have avoided answering it and continued conversation with Mary. He felt like going back home .While he drove back , he could not help thinking about his past .
It was like a really long flashback in a typical Hindi movie . His initial days in the job , his meeting colleagues in the new place of work away from home , his letters to his old classmates , homecomings on holidays , attending annual temple festivals, marriages of old classmates and of course that letter of Mary which he could not reply. There was debate in his mind as to whether he was a coward not to have properly responded to her offer for a lifelong relationship. The vehement defense in his favor was that he stood by the choice of his parents and avoided a split in the family . And moreover the family life with Vimala was very happy . However her untimely death was a cruel blow in his life .
He could not concentrate even on the evening English news in the favorite TV channel . He could hardly eat anything after he sat in front of the dinner table all alone. He took the usual dose of medicine and went to bed . But he could hardly sleep.!
As the FM radio on his bed side gave out the old Hindi numbers of yesteryears , his mind took a plunge in nostalgia. He used to like Mary as a good friend. But beyond discussing matters of study , cinema songs etc, there used to be no more talk during those days .
It was during one of those parents’ meetings that he met her again in the school where his son studied . That meeting quite short . There were a lot of other teachers in the room . His son was also watching him from a distance . He could only gather from his son that Mary was still a spinster. He could also know that she was one of the best teachers of the school. The official transfer and posting to a different town prevented further contact with her .
From nostalgia he took to fantasy. For a moment he thought that could be light at the end of the tunnel. It was like finding an oasis in the midst of a desert . Can he muster enough courage to meet Mary again for frank talk ? The thoughts were passing through his agitated mind as if comets crisscrossed a clear night sky . He did not really know when he fell asleep that night .
He was eagerly waiting for the evening walk the next day . He decided to walk the circle in the anti clockwise direction . He did not know whether it was a deliberate effort to symbolically reverse the passage of time. Many regular walkers greeted him and walked away. He was disappointed . He could meet the person he badly wanted to. The next day was no better . A few days passed without any change in the passive routine .
One day he received a letter from the Bank conveying the extension of the reverse mortgage loan . They had sent the advice for having credited the monthly installment of the loan to the savings account. And requested for a revaluation of the property as per the terms of sanction. The total tenure of the loan was fifteen years , the residual term was nine years !. The Bank officials were unable to answer anything positive for his question as to what could the Bank pay him after the age of 75. They could only assure that Bank would let him stay on in the house till his alive ……
For a moment he thought there is nothing to look forward to in life .. He made up his mind to really take a last chance to meet Mary that evening. They went for the walk quite early . He finished his usual rounds of walk and sat on a bench near the children’s park . The long shadows of the walkers slowly mingled with the darkness which crept in . The garden lights started blinking . They became brighter as the night grew darker . The public radio announced the time as 7.00 pm. As usual, there was enough noise created by the kids and birds and by elders too. Suddenly he saw a girl of about twelve years and a couple standing in front of him. He stood up as Mary said loudly “ hi, good that we saw you today. It was during the first week of our Indian holiday that I saw you here. You went away without even talking to me . Meet Martin and this is my daughter Krishane” . When R K shook hands with Martin his hand was very cold. Martin told “She has been talking about you all these days “as Mary was nodding her head in approval . She told “Krishane is coming to Kerala for the first time , Radha , she is named after you !” He stood still lost in thoughts. He even forgot to greet Krishane properly. Mary continued “ We are going back to Botswana this weekend . I don’t know when could be our next visit to India . How are you ? How is your family ? Where is your son these days ? “ R K did not remember how he answered these queries He felt like leaving the place and did so in a hurry after exchanging email addresses .
For him the sunset was over a few hours ago. But he felt that the night was young for her . Age was (as someone told) only a number . He walked out of the red arch of the museum park and reached his car parked at a distance . As he was driving back home, his old friend Daniel called from Trivandrum club (4) . “R K you should join us for a party tonight. Why are you aloof all these days ? It’s a special occasion you should not miss” . Without much hesitation he drove towards the club. He did go to the bar which he had avoided going after the hospitalization…
What transpired through R K’s mind is left to your imagination
He was dropped back home late in the night!
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(1).Napier Museum…… was built in 1872 named after Lord Napier , then Governor of Madras . It is situated in the heart of Trivandrum. The campus houses museums , art gallery and zoo and spreads over 55 acres of greenery. Hundreds of walkers use the semi circular pathway in the mornings and evenings for walking and jogging.
(2)Reverse Mortgage ……You can avail this facility if you are over 60 and you stay in your own free hold house . The bank either gives a bulk amount for certain specified purposes and/or gives you cash flow for a fixed period of 15 years , lets you stay in the house until death and thereafter takes over the property and makes recovery of dues .
(3)Golf links road ……..Residential area of high net worth individuals of Trivandrum close to Jawahar Nagar and Kowdiar Palace, the abode of Maharaja of Travancore .
(4) Trivandrum Club…………One of the elite clubs in the city which boasts to be over 175 years old having the cream of society as members…
P V Durgadas
Shri. Durgadas worked in Public sector banks for nearly forty years. Retired as general manager. Served in many parts of India. Has toured abroad on official and personal trips. Started writing as a hobby after retirement. His blogs appeared regularly in the Sunday magazine of pen news.net for the past three years.
THE BREW 